don't be offended but thought this was funny

[Asai]

You might be a Redneck When.....


1. You let your 14-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.

2. The Blue Book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas is in it.

3. You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.

4. You think a woman who is 'out of your league' bowls on a different night.

5. You wonder how service stations keep their rest-rooms so clean.

6. Someone in your family died right after saying, 'Hey, yall, watch this.'

7. You think Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader.

8. Your wife's hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan.

9. Your junior prom offered day care.

10. You think the last words of the 'Star-Spangled Banner' are 'Gentlemen, start your engines.'

11. You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off its wheels.

12. The Halloween pumpkin on your porch has more teeth than your spouse.

13. You have to go outside to get something from the fridge.

14. One of your kids was born on a pool table.

15. You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.

16. You can't get married to your sweetheart because there's a law against it.

17. You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk.

I know redneck jokes so 1990s

[Hell-met]

Good stuff

[Rostov]

Not sure what would be refer to as red-necks in Canada. People from Alberta maybe. Newfies too but they tend to be more likeable.....

[Zeitgeist]

you can only be offended if you have the technical where-with-all to operate a computer at the functioning level of a 6 year old.

so you're safe

[insomniaprincess]

Not sure what would be refer to as red-necks in Canada. People from Alberta maybe. Newfies too but they tend to be more likeable.....

A Canadian-redneck list would make me giggle.

You might be a Canadian redneck if...

[insomniaprincess]

I've now been informed Canadian rednecks DO exist:

http://www.canadianredneck.com

Ahh, the wonders of the Internet!

My fav so far (not Canadian-redneck specific, just Canadian specific):

You Know You're Canadian When:

You design your Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.

You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.

Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled in with snow.

The local paper covers national and international headlines on two pages, but requires six pages for hockey.

The municipality buys a Zamboni before a bus.

You eat chocolate bars, not candy bars, and drink pop, not soda.

You use a red pen on your non-Canadian textbooks and fill in the missing u's from labor, honor, and color.

You know how to say free, prize and no sugar added in French thanks to your extensive education in bilingual cereal packaging.

You know what a toque is.

You've plugged a car in overnight.

You've defended your property from trespassers with a lacrosse stick because you don't own a gun.

[Hell-met]

You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.

hahahagdhhahahahah

[Kou]

I drink pop

[Rostov]

I've now been informed Canadian rednecks DO exist:

http://www.canadianredneck.com

That site gave me a bit of a grin. The Reasons to Live in Ontario is sooooooo true. Thanx for the link.

[insomniaprincess]

I drink pop

I used to drink "pop" as a kid but that's because I grew up in the south. It's funny, where my parents live everyone calls it "Coke" no matter what brand or flavor it is... it's all just "coke" hehe